mmmmmmwhatchasay.....

 hello, jason derulo.

my friend shannon (from the good ol' days in nauvoo) got free tickets for the jason derulo concert on tuesday night. we thought long and hard about who to have come to the concert with us. not really. we called lyric and beb right away...and it was the best thing we'd ever done. what a perfect combo for such a concert....

now, i feel like it's been a long time since i went to a concert...like a stand up and dance and scream your head off concert. man alive, i'm not as young as a used to be. i looked around and asked myself, "are these people in college??" granted, i'm sure there were some kiddos there that were not, but still. freshmen in college just keep getting younger and younger, and i can't keep up with them like i used to. i'd like to think that lyric, shannon and i held our own, but everyonce and a while, i'd look down the aisle and see beb jammin'....and i'd just feel old.
it was a great night. we screamed. we danced. we screamed some more. it's always fun to act like you're 18 again (as long as you put a time cap on it) and man alive, jderulo can dance. it made me like him even more. for a full report, you can always visit bebs blog.

overall, great concert. i still love justin bieber more (even if he just came out with his own nail polish line...at least he's thinking of his fans, right??)

cousin power

if you didn't know already, i love my cousins. i got to play with two of my favorite cousins last night. one of them even brought her husband to tag along, which is ok because we happen to like him quite a bit. they came to see my new place and then we went out for dinner...and don't forget those desserts. (sweet mercy, literally).
goodness, we had a good time. it wasn't anything special, but it still suprises me how well we get along. we are all in such different places in life, yet there are still a million and one things to talk about. we can laugh for hours or talk about things close to our hearts. when we get together its guarateed a good night.
we get excited for eachother when good things happen, and rally together during hard times. i can joke about things with these girls that i wouldn't dare say outloud anywhere else. i can be honest with them to tell them when i'm really scared or intimidated, and they say just the right thing to make me realize i can do it. and they are honest with me in giving me advice with boys and the like.

(this is an old pictures, but it's from a very happy day, so i decided to use it.)

ps: everyonce in a while i go through this thought process where i think no one reads my blog. then i have random people admit to being secret blog readers. it's always a little suprising to me, but i love it. i had a friend tell me he read my blog (well, skimmed...but we'll get to that) and i was so suprised. i thought he was wayyyy to cool to read my blog. but then he told me he skimmed, really. he just looked for pictures. so, for those of you secret blog readers that like to see more pictures than text, this is my attempt to please the secret masses. happy skimming.

secret project:revealed

about 2 years ago, i was blog hopping and ended up on this random photography site. this photographer had taken pictures at her family party at her grandparents house, and had taken some great pictures of her grandparents at their home. i thought it was such a good idea - and so it begins. i started looking for photographers, and started thinking about how i would convince my grandparents it was a good idea to have a photographer come to their house and take pictures of them doing everyday things. weather went crazy early, and my grandparents yard, which is usually gorgeous, was...well, not. winter came and went with no visit from a photographer. i had plans to be up at grandmas for efy the following summer, so started making secret plans. i didn't want to get too many people involved. the more people involved, the more opinions there would be (not that that's bad, but i just had a very clear idea of what i wanted).

so, i scheduled the photographer, who was actually an old friend i met while doing a semester in nauvoo.

Early this summer, Jessie made the trek up to grandmas house. she was so easy to work with, and captured everything just the way i had wanted (all while being like 15 months pregnant! ok, not 15...but definetly like 8 3/4) Jessie was great, and i owe her big time for being so patient through the process.

 ok, let's be honest....i'm not the best with secrets. i usually have one person that i have to at tell everything to (sorry if that's you. the idea of getting the pictures back and not sharing them with everyone was just painful for me. but don't you worry, i did it. to an extent. i showed mom and my sister who were helping me with my final secret project - so i felt justified in letting them in on the secret. ok, let's be honest again. i did tell a few cousins, and maybe my aunt who's like another mother to me, and scott (but he doesn't count. not only is he a vault that houses all of my deepest darkest secrets, but he is also a boy that doesn't really care about pictures of my grandparents - not that he doesn't care about my grandparents, but you get the jist)

so, i started my project. and now after hours of work and bribing my grandparents to do their part of my project - IT'S DONE!!!! i'm so happy with how it turned out. I worked hard with my grandparents to get text for a book i put together with all the pictures that were taken. it really is a priceless history of my grandparents

i have a unique relationship with my grandparents. i don't know if it's because we've lived together for three summers, but i'm so grateful for the playful, honest, and loving relationship that we have. they are so wise, kind, accepting and encouraging. i've learned to much from them and am so grateful for the influence they've had in my life. if my future marriage results in even half of the happiness and satisfaction that my grandparents have found, i'll be a happy girl.

lately

i've had alot of my mind. coming to the end of transition phase will do that to you. i'm sure you're all bored of hearing about the longest transition period of all time, (how do i know that? because i'm sick of hearing about it. i'm sick of thinking about it. i'm sick of being in it!) but it's sparked some thought processes that have really changed the way i've gone about things lately. here's a few thoughts:

• i had a pleasant conversation with a patient today that kind of summed things up for me. we were chit-chatting and getting to know her a little bit (side note: there are different ways that each technician connects with patients. it's been very interesting to me to follow other technicians and see how they make the connection with patients. some like to have all the answers - talk medical jargon - and put them at ease with the health of their eye while answering questions about eye disease and surgery healing times. some like to make them feel at ease by encouraging them during the exam - "very good" and "thank yous" - very complimentary and very kind. some like to think they are doctors and explain everything to them, whether they asked for the information or not. well, this is a long side note, now isn't it. MY way to connect with patients is to be their friend. it may sound silly, but i want to know about that person. you're a student? what are you studying? how many kids do you have? where are you from? where do you work? blah blah blah. it's so interesting to learn about people. everyone has such an interesting story. you'd be suprised how much smoother an exam can go when you aren't just asking about a person's vision. and it puts me at ease a bit to feel like i'm on a somewhat common ground with the person before i start asking personal questions about their medical history and eye health. it might sound silly, but i love it.) ok, sorry, really long side note. back to my conversation with this lady. she asked if i was lds. before you knew it we were talking about how i grew up in las vegas. then went to school in provo and lived there for 10 years, and now that i'm in slc, i'm back in an enviroment a little more like las vegas. there are all different age groups and lifestyles up here that are so different and diverse compared to my easy-peasy life in provo where there were so many people my same age that shared my beliefs. and so with this patient, i had a conversation about standards and how people view you. what kind of person would my co-workers say that i am? would they know that i'm lds by the way that i act at work? do they know what my standards are by the way that i treat people? how do i speak? what does that say about me? it's an interesting thought process, and one that i'm grateful for lately. it's allowed me to re-evaluate and re-prioritize a bit. i'm able to act as an example in a different way than i've been able to these past 10 years. i'm looking forward to it actually. i think it's going to make me "raise the bar" in my own life, which i think can only be a good thing. sorry, long explanation for a simple thought.
• i hate unpacking. it might take me longer than necessary to have EVERYTHING put away, so if you come visit me and there are still boxes out, don't hate me. don't judge me. just love that i finally have a place to live. thank you.
• do you believe people can change? i do. i've had a few experiences in my life where i've seen it happen...for the good...for the bad. i've seen it happen in myself. i could go off on so many tangents on this topic, but i'm not sure where it would go and where i would end up taking it...making it dangerously inappropriate for this blog. let's just say my feelings are too involved in this topic on so many levels. if you think this specific comment is directed at you, you may be right. but most likely may be wrong....because i dont think i'm thinking about something specific. except that's a lie. i am. but it's not what you're thinking. ok, we'll focus on me for a minute. i think i've changed. i look back at 18 year old beth, 21 year old beth, 25 year old beth....and i was different. oh heavens, i was different. i was immature, naive, silly, blonde, slightly obsessive (sometimes) and very impatient. i'm not saying i'm currently ranked at a ten, but i've grown quite a bit since those years. i'm sure i'll look back in another 10 years and say "oh 28 year old beth, if you could have only seen how good you have it now, you would not worry like you do. just relax a bit, and know that even though this may not be how you pictured it in your mind, 38 year old beth is so much better off than 28 year old beth ever imagined". i can't wait to have that conversation with myself. it's going to be very gratifying. until then, i will continue to try to be more patient that 27 year old beth, try to be less chubby than 24 year old beth, try to be as dedicated at 25 year old beth, and as fun and as friendly as blonde beth. long story short, i get better with age...like a fine wine, or cheese. (except i don't drink wine, and cheese makes my stomach ache. i'm afraid those are two things that will not change over time)
• do you know where i am right now? my bed? i wish. i'm sitting in my car. typing my little heart out, while my phone charges. LAME. my phone charger ended up in my brothers backpack my accident during the big move this weekend. my brother lives in provo, therefore, my phone charger is on vacay in provo. shame shame, who takes a holiday mid week? i wish i could have missed monday like my phone charger did. soooo, i am left to my car charger. normally i would have a 20 minute drive to and from work that i could recharge that bad boy....but alas, no longer. remember how it took me SIX minutes to get to work this morning? of course, that didn't include the fence hopping, but still. six glorious minutes. i don't know how that translated to 20 more minutes in my bed this morning, but somehow it happened. something i will not be making a habit of (well, we'll see...) don't worry. i think i've been sitting out here for 30 minutes and i'm only charged to 70%. again, LAME. so all you phone users out there, don't go takin' your charger for granted. and charge your phone in your house like a normal person tonight in my phone chargers memory. dear phone charger: i hope you've enjoyed your vacation. please come home now. love, bethany...and droid.

okay, this post has become very long and alot more random than i originally anticipated. i think it would be best if i ended now. plus, i've been sitting indian style in the drivers seat for who knows how long and i can't really feel my legs anymore. i might just have to be satisfied with 70% and call it good.

gentleman caller

where for art thou?

until you show up, i'll continue to be confused about other situations.

thank you.

guess now it's official

i moved. this time, for good....for a while anyways. it feels good. i have my own bed. i have my own closet. and while everything isn't put away yet, i have a really good feeling that everything is going to find it's place. it will be nice to get organized and situated. i love my new place. i haven't taken pictures on my camera yet to post, because, to be honest with you, i'm not quite sure which box my camera is in. i did take this picture on my phone.

that is my kitchen. beautiful, right?

anyways, it's been a long weekend of family and cleaning and moving and conference and not enough sleep and friends and more family. needless to say it's been rather busy. thank you thank you to my family who drove up from out of state to help me with the big move. brothers came up north to get my blasted couches in my new house, which i am beyond grateful for.

so, i'm officially welcoming visitors. coming up to slc for something? stop on by. need a place to bunk for the night? give me a call. want to cook a gourmet meal for me in my kitchen, no appointment necesary. come one, come all.

but really though, probably call first.

i thought i was done with this

Remember how I love my job? Great.

Now, remember how I'm working to become certified at work? Kind of a big deal. They give me tools and books to study, practice tests, and even give me time to study at work. Fantastic.

Except, I hate to study. It was one of the reasons I believed college was ruining my life (thank goodness for perspective). I don't think I'm good at studying. I was never one to hit the books at the library. I just don't learn that way. There always seems to be too much information and I'm horrible when it comes to weeding out the information you don't need. I think I'm what people call a hands on learner. Forget the books. Just show me and I'll catch on much quicker.

So I'm making flashcards to help me learn the anatomy of the eye...a little more my style. Let's hope that all I'm reading about refractive light and primary angle closure glaucoma and extra ocular muscles sticks. My heavens, the eyeball is complex...